Morons of the Internet: Bruno Russell

This is the segment where I scour my favorite forums around the internet and find some particularly interesting articles about current affairs told in the words of my favorite human beings.

In this edition we have a student who believes he has the solution to why children are so unhappy. Unfortunately it turns out this becomes little more than a way to promote his own feelings that haven't even the slightest grip on reality.
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https://www.wessexscene.co.uk/opinion/2015/08/25/why-is-our-government-making-british-children-unhappy/
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Oh no, it's instantly obvious that this article will be based on feelings instead of factual evidence. I wouldn't be surprised if it was written by somebody who studies philosophy or some other similar subject that nobody has taken seriously since Ancient Greece, and now thinks that his knowledge will pass as factual evidence despite being total bollocks. Here we have an example of a student thinking that it's the government's moral obligation to eradicate bullying from schools to increase happiness, which although logical is simply not realistic. Bullying is always going to be present in not just schools, but society as well. Whether the reasons for doing so are personal gratification or just the human urge to feel better than others, there is always going to be tension and judgmental conflicts between two different individuals when one doesn't fit in like everyone else. It doesn't matter whether it's for being a homosexual, being a transgender child, or even for wearing glasses, the government should at no point start interfering in what kids are allowed to say and what they can't, especially when the result is branding adolescents with titles such as 'homophobe' and 'racist' that will stay with them for life.

And your source for all of this; why it's the famously reliable and not at all biased 'Daily Mail'. A journalistic source that sells copies by provoking reactions out of the public, so there is absolutely zero chance that any of your information cited has been fabricated in any way. It's also slightly worrying that your main source as to why British children are so unhappy is based on a 'global' study of just fifteen countries. Fifteen. That might indicate the primary data in your assumptions might not be reflective of the reality at all. I find this terrible use of statistics a poor reason to start blasting wild accusations at the government, especially when UNICEF, who let's face it are going to be more reliable than the 'Daily Mail', state that children's wellbeing is actually around average for Europe (https://www.unicef.org.uk/Images/Campaigns/ReportCard11_CYP.pdf). We have to ask is there any issue at all here?

Well this article was quick to pass judgment. Since when did bullying become exclusive to the homosexual community? I can assure you that many normal children also experience bullying, so why the parameters have suddenly become so specific is suspicious to say the least. These statistics might be relevant if you could prove that homophobia causes unhappiness in a significant portion of British children, but you can't. This suddenly looks like a poor excuse to shove your own biased agenda down my throat that doesn't in any way relate to the question. I'll agree that throwing money at something doesn't solve the issue, but that doesn't mean we should start dictating the lives of children in education, as that might end up creating a factory like environment, which you were so keen on highlighting in a previous paragraph. In my funny little world I thought refining the behaviour of children, or 'moulding individuals' as you put it, is exactly the same as a factory like system that you were criticising.

Then we arrive at another terrible use of statistics. 'Homophobic bullying has actually become the most severe'. I must have missed out on learning about the 'standard homophobia measurement system'. I've always stupidly assumed that you could only quantify objective measurements, but apparently it turns out homophobia is objective to philosophers. Maybe they should think a bit harder before using statistics as badly as that ever again, but then that level of thought might make them realise that philosophy is a huge waste of fucking time. Being as you're actually a philosopher I would also have expected you to have thought long and hard about the solution as well, but it turns out you think that highlighting homophobic behaviour and then telling children to stop doing it will work. I seem to recall that attitude of discouraging smoking and banning chewing gum did nothing to stop the problem in education, so I suggest painting a massive bullseye on the back of all homosexuals instead since they're all going to become bigger targets under your system. 

Oh for fuck sake, here we go with this body positivity bollocks. Let me guess, you're one of those people who pose as leaders for diversity to try and make yourself look better, when in reality your false sense of sophistication is overshadowed by your blatant denial of how the world actually works. You actually believe that there isn't a link between image and personality. Bullshit: (http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/7280161). And here comes that shitty source work again. This time it's a sitcom actor doing a documentary on BBC3, who are famous for spoonfeeding adolescents, but at least that's better than the fucking 'Daily Mail' again. These sources in no way explain how a so called 'perfect body' is in any way bad for children. What's wrong with having an aspiration that's healthy and looks attractive? It's ambitious for a reason, and a much better example than looking at some bed ridden bag of cholesterol that nobody will ever love because the fact is that people are judgmental. I admire you for trying to see through people's exterior, but a large part of me can't help but feel that in reality that's bollocks and you're just as judgmental in who you find attractive. That's how biology works, which must be a big step up for you considering that the discipline of biology relies on facts instead of subjective bollocks.

Again, this is just your feelings. You must be aware that in reality people are always going to be judgmental. Despite this, your solution to increase happiness with unhealthy people is censorship. Yes, without any causative evidence to back up this radical procedure, you think that showing children a well built human specimen as an example has an overall detrimental effect. Under your regime Calvin Klein will end up using repulsive models such as yourself to hopelessly try and advertise their products; and nobody wants to buy a product that's aimed at vile people like yourself. The study from the University of Kent that you cite says that average sized models 'could' have the same effect, and at no point suggests they're superior to their less realistic counterparts. Couple that with the evidence you have as to why we shouldn't have body standards is because it decreases happiness and your argument soon falls apart, not to mention that happiness can't be quantified. Other things that decrease happiness include losing a game of football, so shall we ban that as well while we get the chance. Yes, let's make all children's lives miserable to appease the minority who are currently unhappy, because in the spirit of your argument there is no better way to celebrate the individuality of students than by refining them even further.

Well that's an interesting conclusion considering that you still haven't provided any evidence that even links the government's obsession over grades to the wellbeing of students. Even more worrying is that your solutions towards curing the happiness of children are to implement the policing of language, censoring attractive bodies that don't reflect the average human, and allowing children to become unhealthy. No I'm sure those flawless procedures will have a dramatic effect on the happiness of children, even though you still haven't comprehended that happiness can't be measured. So no, don't listen to any of the bollocks in this article. More social elements in schools can fuck off. Keep teaching children actual facts that aren't some pretentious philosophy student's worthless feelings, especially when his solutions make Adolf Hitler look like the Virgin Mary. Why can't we just let children enjoy their childhoods without constantly interfering to dictate what's best for them?