Rather an odd choice for a review you may think, and you would be right, but there is some method behind my madness. You see I did want to review a Katy Perry song, and whilst scrolling through the endless generic drivel I came across this number. It stood out to me as it's meant to be a pop rock song, now I like pop rock when done correctly and I was certainly very skeptical when Katy Perry, a manufactured pop singer, decides to branch out a little. The other reason it stood out for me was the fact that Katy had actually written the song herself, now this would've previously just been stuck on the fridge by the producers but this time they gave her a chance and so it will certainly be interesting to see the results of this one.
Now on the face of things it doesn't look great, the cover doesn't look aesthetically exciting and inventive in any way and is coupled with the most expressionless face of all time, making Kristen Stewart look like Michael Gambon. I just get the initial impression that there wasn't a lot of though or ingenuity put into this song which probably suggests it's going to be very generic, oh dear. The video appears to be more of a costume drama than anything else, it puts a WW2 fallen soldier spin on the song for some reason. This is a stupid decision, mainly because this song has zero references to WW2 in it, and secondly Katy Perry has no experience of losing a lover in a war and so therefore the song is not personal, just over commercialised artificial crap, which is a shame as this is really the first time Katy Perry has actually sung, or more mimed, about anything serious, she usually just tries to promote her songs by selling herself rather than her music.
I'll say this about the song, she gives it a try, but sometimes a try isn't enough. Her voice is just really not suited to the task at hand here, and well she ends up sounding like she's been smoking 50,000 cigarettes a day, endlessly panting through each verse. She's not exactly consistent either, it's one thing having a nice steady beat but it's another to actually stick to it. I don't particularly hate Katy's voice but it really doesn't suit this song. Oh and while we're here I should mention that she's stripping off again, just stop it, don't bother with a serious song if you're going to act like an annoying little slut throughout the duration. As I was saying this song shows that Katy Perry has zero flexibility, maybe she should go back to the pointless rubbish that she was doing before as this song shows that she really can't adapt to a more serious message. As for the actual soundtrack, well it wasn't too bad, I mean it was nothing special but at least it was smooth and consistent, unlike certain other things in this song. Now it is time for me to analyse the lyrics which is probably going to be like Pearl harbor crossed with Showgirls, and I don't have high opinions on both those films:
Comparisons are easily done
Once you've had a taste of perfection
Like an apple hanging from a tree
I picked the ripest one, I still got the seed
You said move on, where do I go?
I guess second best is all I will know
Well that's pleasant, and quite a nice metaphor I might add. Although I can't help but feel that this man isn't perfection, as he has to leave you to do his duty. Didn't really think that one through did you.
'Cause when I'm with him
I am thinking of you
Thinking of you
What you would do if
You were the one
Who was spending the night
Oh I wish that I
Was looking into your eyes
Anyone else feeling sorry for her new man, I mean she could tell him but oh no, let him suffer. That's right because it's all about you isn't it, doesn't matter what he thinks about you.
You're like an Indian summer
In the middle of winter
Like a hard candy
With a surprise center
How do I get better
Once I've had the best?
You said there's
Tons of fish in the water
So the waters I will test
Oh she's pulling out the superlatives here, wow. I don't know what she means by an Indian summer, does she mean surprising, or a bit retarded, maybe he gave her the trots, who knows. I shall also answer her rhetorical question, as I enjoy being a rebel, and I will answer it with the simple statement that indeed you cannot get better, I thought that was pretty self explanatory and so your cry for pity is not welcome here. Also the expression is tons of fish in the sea, I tried looking in the tap but I couldn't find any fish there, might suggest this perfect man is a bit of a moron. Still why not test the waters, It's not like you're going to be thinking about him is it.
He kissed my lips
I taste your mouth
He pulled me in
I was disgusted with myself
(Chorus)
Oh for fuck sake, if you're going to be like this then what's the point, is thinking about him going to get him back? I though not, shit happens, you get over it.
You're the best
And yes I do regret
How I could let myself
Let you go
Now, now the lesson's learned
I touched it I was burned
Oh I think you should know
(Chorus)
This song doesn't really develop does it.
Looking into your eyes
Looking into your eyes
Oh won't you walk through
And bust in the door
And take me away
Oh no more mistakes
'Cause in your eyes I'd like to stay... stay.
Oh for god sake, he's dead, just accept it. This is the main problem with the lyrics, they just don't develop, you could snip out the majority of this song and it would still tell the same story, which is the sign of poor and uncreative lyrics. Let's see how the internet received it:
Digital Spy said: "There's nothing in the way of novelty value here, making it a bigger
challenge for Perry to pull off. So does she succeed? Well, certainly
not for want of trying".
This is an accurate statement, definitely nothing original about the song. She does give it a good attempt but the weak lyrics and her inconsistent voice mean that it just doesn't work out.
Rolling Stone, who are a bit like the Bruce Forsythe of magazines, commented: "Yes, Perry has a heart, but it sounds like her bustier's too tight for her to use it. " Ha, I like this, seriously though even when she's not being sexual she still feels the need to take her fucking clothes off.
Overall this song doesn't really do anything special. It tries to be a serious pop rock ballad but just ends up feeling artificial. Weak lyrics and a horrible voice don't exactly help this half-assed song. It's definitely not the worst song in the world, but it's a pretty bad one.
Hooray, it's my favorite genre of all time, indie rock. Wow the crap that has spewed out from this genre is unbelievable. Hoping to buckle the trend this time are the breakthrough British rock, and I use that term lightly, band, who sort of sound like a middle class version of Jamie Oliver, who for some reason people seem to love.
On the face of things I'm slightly confused, I would've thought this song would be about the Roman city of Pompeii that was destroyed by the erupting Mount Vesuvius like any normal person, or at least a metaphor based around it anyway. But the original message I get from the album cover is rather strange, it appears to be a rip off version of the twins from The Shining playing a multiplayer game at their local arcade, which is where they appear in the music video, what that has to do with the ancient city of Pompeii I have no idea. The video doesn't exactly help either, it's like something out of The Walking Dead and is set in Los Angeles, which is exactly the same as Pompeii apart from in every single way, but I suppose we'll find out why when we analyse the lyrics.
The song begins with some sort of ethnic chant, it certainly isn't a bad thing although it does sound like something you would hear at a football ground, and it also annoys me how it continues throughout the whole song, it definitely overstays its welcome. However the harmony does set up the first verse nicely and creates a nice atmosphere for the verses to flow from. The chorus too is expertly applied to great effect, the short pause before the increasingly upbeat rhythm really is used very effectively, and I can't help but sing along. The rest of the song doesn't actually develop to anything else, in fact it becomes quite repetitive, but I didn't really expect it to from a more pop orientated song. It is certainly a lot better than most of the other crap that indie rock spews out, and it certainly feels quite original. I have to admit I do quite like this song, it's well paced and easily accessible and doesn't try to become anything it isn't, it knows it isn't the greatest song of all time and so it just sticks to the basics, and it does this very well. However now I have come to the point where I had my original doubts, and these were the lyrics, I just hope they're not pointless:
I was left to my own devices
Many days fell away with nothing to show
And the walls kept tumbling down
In the city that we love
Great clouds roll over the hills
Bringing darkness from above
I think this begins by describing the normality of the lives for the citizens of Pompeii, or any city for that matter, there is certainly Pompeii references scattered throughout this verse and it ends with a physical description, and admiration of the giant ash cloud that will inevitably destroy the city. The song is definitely sticking to the theme so far, however I still haven't discovered the premise of the song, I don't want it to literally be about Pompeii.
But if you close your eyes,
Does it almost feel like
Nothing changed at all?
And if you close your eyes,
Does it almost feel like
You've been here before?
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?
How am I gonna be an optimist about this?
The chorus deals with denial, I think it's here we finally understand the subject of the song. The character is in a huge predicament, on the scale of Pompeii, he is living in denial and watching as his life crumbles around him, just like the city of Pompeii. That is a very good metaphor.
We were caught up and lost in all of our vices
In your pose as the dust settles around us
(Repeat Chorus)
This section implies that even after the dust has settledthe problems still continue, which is slightly ironic as when the dust settles it usually means that is the end of the situation, not in this case, like a Pompeii scale tragedy.
Oh where do we begin?
The rubble or our sins?
Oh where do we begin?
The rubble or our sins?
(Repeat Chorus)
This song is definitely repetitive. I also think the situation has been blown out of proportion, I don't think his issues are anywhere near as bad as they were for the people of Pompeii, I would ask them but that might be quite difficult. This section is slightly optimistic, for the first time he has become aware of the situation and is now thinking of ways to rectify it, a nice positive end, contrary to what the video would have you believe.
I will admit I do also like the lyrics, I do think it's a bit overly dramatic for such a small issue but the use of metaphor is very good which is a pleasant surprise, especially from what is in essence a pop song. Now let's see what the users of the internet thought about this:
Sam Mummery said on Amazon:
"The Title says it all, amazing song by an amazing, is and will be
Bastilles best ever song and one of the best songs of the last 10 years".
I think this song might be a bit overrated, especially in the opinion of this person who is not only a massive idiot, but a psychic as well. It isn't one of the best songs of the last 10 years, not even close but it is certainly one of the better ones.
Digital Spy said:
"But if you close your eyes/ Does it almost feel like nothing changed at
all?" singer Dan Smith asks his beau over bounding beats and a
sing-along chant loftier than his perfectly-styled quiff. It may have
been two years in the making, but this is the sound of a band ready for a
breakthrough". Again I don't think the song is that good but I really do hope this is a breakthrough single, I certainly don't mind Bastille and I really do think they have good potential, they really are unique in what is now a very under-performing market.
Overall I can say I do like this song, it is definitely a catchy and well made number. Unlike the usual commercial crap we get today this actually feels well thought through. I can see why people love this, but it certainly isn't the best song in the world and I'm still very confused by the music video, but overall thumbs up from me, rare I can say that about today's music.
Wow, Call of Duty certainly has spiraled out of control in most people's minds, I have always been one to defend Call of Duty, I don't think it ever gets the credit it deserves, and so I will now review the next entrant in what must be the most hated franchise of all time and see how it compares to its competition. Again, this is for the previous gen consoles and so it may be slightly different on the newer consoles.
I'll start with the main reason anyone plays Call of Duty, and that's multiplayer. Unlike EA, Activision decided to actually bother changing this, well sort of anyway, it still feels like Call of Duty although there is a slight indication that this franchise is ready to move on, but they decided to milk the current format a bit more. To be fair there are a few developments, namely more dynamic maps that finally have destructible elements in them, I'm not going to even pretend that they're nearly as good as Battlefield as it only has a minor affect on the maps, but it's a sign of development which the franchise desperately needs. Another addition is spawning briefcases that issue the player a challenge, completion of these challenges leads to unique killstreaks which is definitely a good idea and I did enjoy using them, even if the challenges were a bit plain.
Unfortunately the multiplayer is nowhere near as fun as its predecessors, the weapons lack variation and each gun feels very similar to the last and selection is now personal preference rather than strategy. The weapons are also terribly balanced, some are ridiculously overpowered which makes multiplayer more frustrating than intense, some are easily a two shot kill from the other side of the map. The game modes are still as good as ever with welcome returns of personal favorites such as Infected and Gun Game, and also new modes that only really expand on previous modes and offer nothing particularly radical. The exclusion of Ground War is also surprising, this popular game mode always used to be a very fun and hectic game mode and so I'm very disapointed to see it only on the current gen consoles.
This years zombie replacement is known as extinction mode, and it is shit. I was never a massive fan of zombies, it always seemed like a big fuss over nothing, but it was fun to play and I praised it for that. Extinction mode isn't fun to play, the aliens are really dull and the sole strategy seems to be shoot some alien things, then kill an egg. Doing that multiple times isn't particularly exciting and it really makes me wonder whether COD needs these mini-games when it could just focus on the multiplayer.
Now COD has rarely dropped the ball on the campaign, unlike their EA counterparts, but it seems this year they both suffer from the same massive flaw, lack of character development. The actual premise of the Ghosts plot was very good, if a bit patriotic, the enemy faction aren't really a serious threat unless they get their hands on this ODIN thing, which is quite awesome and an excellent hinge for the plot to be based on, but the plot just ends up with the USA being built as the underdogs which never really worked. The characters also didn't work, I just never felt the need to care about any of them throughout the plot. In a previous COD game I would've cared about a family member dying, like in Black Ops 2, but this time I really didn't care. It doesn't help that the main character seems to be a fucking dog called Riley who just becomes more of a nuisance rather than contributing ANYTHING to the actual plot, just why? However at the end of the day it is still great fun, I just wish a bit more care would be taken when crafting the storyline.
The missions are mainly well crafted, there are a few dull and pointless segments but that's mainly due to the fucking dog. There is also a nice variety of settings with missions feeling unique, but not exactly looking brilliant on the previous gen consoles, especially when compared to Battlefield. Definitely the strongest part of the game is the ending to the campaign. It ends in a big shock, which is a pleasant surprise coming from a company who like to emulate their material rather too fondly, I thought I knew every trick in the COD book of cliche, but thankfully I was proved wrong. The ending really is generally fantastic and I seriously can't think of a better ending to a FPS in the last few years, maybe only topped by the original Modern Warfare, it does genuinely make me want to part another £50 for the inevitable sequel.
Overall this game fells exactly like they promised it wouldn't be, repetitive. It certainly isn't the worst game in the world but the Call of Duty fanbase needs steps forward to develop their franchise, and this is just a step backwards.
Final Score: 68/100
Favorite Quote: "Everyone was expecting us to make Modern Warfare 4, which would have
been the safe thing to do. But we’re not resting on our laurels". Infamous quote here from executive producer Mark Rubin. Favorite Moment: Lending this game to a friend and just playing Modern Warfare 3 Worst Moment: Being quickscoped by a bot on recruit difficulty.
Well it seems I've been ignoring this game for a while now and so I thought I would finally review it and see if it really does finally beat Call of Duty. This review is for the Xbox 360 version and so the game may vary a little for the next gen consoles for which is intended to be played on.
Well let's begin shall we by addressing the main issue with the game. Nothing has fucking changed. I find it almost insulting that Call of Duty has to completely revamp its franchise with every installment to gain acceptance, where as over in Sweden they can get away with not bothering. I really don't believe this game is worth another £40 as there are very little changes. The main changes to the general gameplay come in the form of the addition of dual scopes, which I remember coming to Call of Duty in MW3, funny that. There is also a ridiculously overpowered targeting system that instantly reveals all enemies within an area, making the campaign a hell of a lot easier, but apart from that there really isn't a lot more. Rather disappointing.
Now the main development in the campaign comes in the form of a new tactical visor, wow, which really isn't necessary in a game like this. Far Cry possibly, but Battlefield, no. The campaign has the usual bravado that DICE include such as collectible tags and weapons that encourage the player to actually bother with the campaign, although as we shall find out later that's the only reason you would. I do like the unlockables in the campaign, it's a nice reward for players who have actually bothered with sitting through the whole story. The campaign also looks very nice, the cities look beautiful and it's sometimes nice to admire the stunning views while your squad-mates endlessly catch up with you, because they're lazy and useless. The other problem with the campaign is the AI are so glitchy and unintelligent that they're effectively broken which becomes rather frustrating when a soldier just randomly runs through your whole squad with nobody giving a single shit.
Multiplayer has remained almost exactly the same, there are now 64 players for next gen consoles but on the current gen there are still the standard 24, which still works nicely and the maps barely seem empty and they're still fun to play on. There are also some nice additions with cleverly designed maps that make full use of the local terrain and landmarks and the new levelution system, ugh horrible word, works like a dream and makes the maps dynamic and unique every time you play them. There are new weapons and vehicles available, but nothing really revolutionary, it's just the same thing you expect from Battlefield. The main addition for multiplayer comes in the form of commander mode, which allows a player to command their army. Sounds good in practice, but rarely do I see it being used effectively, it seems a good idea may have been wasted.
Now the plot is an interesting one, probably as you have no idea what the hell is happening. Never once was I introduced to the premise of the plot, I had to get that information from the title of the missions. Neither was I told about the antagonist, who it turns out isn't the leader of China like the game makes out and is instead trying to get power in China, important details the game never bothers to tell you so in the end the big bad villain looks like Mao Zedong if he worked at your local Chinese takeaway. It seems they haven't quite copied this villain thing yet from Call of Duty, which is a shame as they've copied everything else. The rest of the cast include the protagonist, who doesn't talk, smart move, it's not as if we need to care about the good guy is it, generic squad-mate number one, a stereotypical Chinese immigrant and an annoying black guy who does the talking for the protagonist, which isn't good as he's fucking annoying. The only hint of an interseting character we get is from a wounded Chinese man who is somehow the catalyst of the plot, but that was also never explained, but he is unfortunately stationed in the fucking med bay throughout the campaign.
Obviously this doesn't bode well for the story, and in fact the best part is the opening scene where Bonnie Tyler is playing in the background, until of course that's ruined by a fucking QTE. The opening part of the story however is filled with fun missions and the story progresses nicely, if without any direction, there are the occasional moments where you think you're playing Call of Duty with the over the top action sequences, but I forgive that. Arguably the strongest section of the campaign comes in the middle stages with an impressive double turn that is expertly written, and a returning character, who is in no way a rip off of Viktor Reznov, that helps you escape a prison, that is in no way a rip off of Vorkuta. However, this doesn't last, as the ending feels rushed and very anticlimatic. The main problems come from a very poorly done COD back from the dead heroic return and a final decision that only hangs on personal preference and has no bearing on anything. This is my problem with this campaign, nothing is explained and there are no repercussions to anything you do, the player is just expected to go along with what is happening. A good example of this is when Irish is just about to reveal why he is called Irish, a good chance for some character development, but then is cut short and it's never mentioned again. It seems Swedish literature died with Stieg Larsson as the plot is so poorly constructed and thought through that I ended up feeling very disappointed.
Overall then this seems like a rather pointless game. Why do I have to spend more money to get the same Battlefield experience I got with the previous games. There are definitely some improvements and it is certainly a step in the right direction, but as per usual it's brilliant multiplayer, terrible campaign. Same shit, different day.
Final Score: 74/100
Favorite Quote: "Turnaround, every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears" - Bonnie Tyler
Favorite Moment: Killing a Battlefield fan boy with the luckiest quickscope in the world.
Worst Moment: Oh another mandatory update, it's only 2GB this time and won't at all take an hour to download.
This song annoys me, mainly because of its success that it really doesn't deserve, it seems to be played on the radio every five minutes which makes me wonder who likes it. I just don't get it, why is this so popular, Adele's record sales are off the chart and I really can't seem to find a reason why, maybe people are just morons. The premise of the song is a personal tale of an emotionally scorned lover, which is brilliant, I really appreciate Adele using me as her shoulder to cry on, especially as I've never met her and therefore couldn't give a single shit about any of her problems, but at least it makes the song personal and that might be conveyed in the actual song. Adele herself has described the song as a "dark blues-y gospel disco tune" which I'm pretty sure means utter shit, remember the lesson from Bohemian Rhapsody, don't juxtapose genres, it doesn't work.
The song starts with an intro that is blatantly ripped off of I Touch Myself which leads into the vocalsof Adele's well rounded but croaky voice, it really isn't that good. The song isn't exactly compelling at the moment, the beat and lack of instruments all revolve around Adele's voice that means the song is rather plain at this pointbut it does pick up into some sort of chorus. This is where my main issue is with this song, that bloody background singer, she adds absolutely nothing to the song and either just repeats what Adele has already said or some nonsensical rubbish. It's also quite repetitive, you just get the feeling that very little though went into this song and they had some gaps to fill. They don't even repeat crucial parts of the plot, it's just random lines that might sound good if sung again, but a bit differently this time, it adds absolutely nothing. That is the thing this song lacks, a bit of drama that Adele's voice cannot hope to compensate for, the rest of the song just screams plain as everything revolves around the one element. As I have explained before, a good song is about the culmination of multiple elements, not just the one. With only one element being used effectively the song feels lacking and underwhelming, especially as Adele isn't the most captivating of people. Let's analyze the lyrics:
There's a fire starting in my heart
Reaching a fever pitch, it's bringing me out the dark
Finally I can see you crystal clear
Go 'head and sell me out and I'll lay your shit bare
See how I leave with every piece of you
Don't underestimate the things that I will do
Well what a pleasant person she sounds, I've got a good feeling why their breaking up, and it might be to do with her, the self centered bitch. Generic depressing pop lyrics follow.
The scars of your love remind me of us
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless
I can't help feeling
We could have had it all
That's right be optimistic now, probably a bit late for that. If you had displayed some optimism before instead of being a self centered cow then I would be somewhat sympathetic. She still thinks he's the man she fell in love with, which means she hasn't learnt her lesson. I thought you can see him crystal clear, turns out that might be bullshit. Interesting how when something is positive it is 'we' whereas anything negative is his fault, I'm starting to think this song may be slightly unreliable.
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
Rolling in the deep
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You had my heart inside of your hand
(You're gonna wish you never had met me)
And you played it, to the beat
(Tears are gonna fall, rolling in the deep)
You don't want to get played, then how about not being an easy target to manipulate. A lot of repetition here, and also quite annoying.
Baby, I have no story to be told
But I've heard one on you
And I'm gonna make your head burn
Think of me in the depths of your despair
Make a home down there
As mine sure won't be shared
(Chorus)
Am I missing something here, if she has no story to be told then what is the point of this song, I'm pretty sure this is her account of the story hidden behind all the unnecessary wining and bullshit. She preaches revenge, but the real losers here are the public, we have to sit through it every ten seconds.
Throw your soul through every open door (woah)
Count your blessings to find what you look for (woah)
Turn my sorrow into treasured gold (woah)
You'll pay me back in kind and reap just what you sow (woah)
(Chorus)
Huh, maybe she does want to be with him, just what the fuck is going on? One minute she wants to be with him, the next she hates him, make up your fucking mind or just don't bother, preferably the later option.
Well the lyrics seem to make absolutely no sense and are very poorly constructed, but let's see what other people think about it. Highly renowned and intellectual British newspaper The Sun commented: "an epic, foot-stomper of a pop anthem with thumping piano and a vocal
you would expect from a veteran of 20 years on the road."
Epic, wow, if ever that term was used incorrectly it was definitely there, this song doesn't feel epic in any way. Interesting how she has been 20 years on the road when she herself is only 25, that means her musical career started when she was 5, somehow I don't think that adds up, not that anybody reading The Sun could work that out.
Later on it proclaims: "'Rolling In the Deep' wastes no time in presenting the stunning
bluesy authority of her voice. Less than five seconds in she begins
proclaiming the rise of emotion that results in fantasies of revenge
against a lover who has done her wrong. Hers is a voice that can raise
chills up the spine, and, when she is in a mood like this, the sense of
foreboding will rivet your attention."
I think this is a very complex way of saying she's a bit of a bitch, and I'm sorry but with so little charisma being put on display it is little wonder that this song is a very long way from putting a chill up my spine. But I will definitely agree with the sense of foreboding, the song certainly becomes intolerable, except it doesn't quite rivet my attention.
Overall then this song is bloody annoying. Everyone raves about how brilliant it is and how much emotion is put into it, but the fact is the emotion is lost in the uncharismatic persona and lackluster lyrics of the song which in the end makes the song worse than average. The vocal range bullshit and fancy piano playing don't get away from the fact that in the end the song is painfully dull.
