Morons of the Internet: Eleanor Robertson (01/04/15)

This is the segment where I scour my favorite forums around the internet and find some particularly interesting articles about current affairs told in the words from some of my favorite human beings.

In this edition we have a type of article that I very rarely come across. It's one of those types where I genuinely can't be bothered to structure a response because of the sheer stupidity of this person. I don't know why I should bother, considering that there really isn't any point to this whole article, and so I'll just use my words to endlessly moan about this moronic waste of an organism.
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http://m.dailylife.com.au/news-and-views/dl-opinion/why-im-not-into-music-by-men-anymore-20150226-13ptqh.html
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I have to admit that in this stage of my life I have a very biased collection in my music tastes. As rock music is my preferred genre I often find that the entirety of my music collection is actually recorded by male artists. Rock music is historically dominated by the male demographic and so as a result I don't own a single album released by a female artist, so I should title my response 'Why I was never into music by women'. But then that would be a bit pointless considering that this whole argument shouldn't have anything to do with gender, only musical taste. Where this author got the idea of these male feelings is quite bizarre. I would encourage her to listen to my list of five star songs at the bottom of the page, which are all released by men, and challenge her to find these 'same male feelings' that she loves to bang on about. Sure the songs are all written from a male perspective, but the great thing about music is that it's a subjective art form, so the message to every song is personal. For this reason it's categorically impossible for these same male feelings to be on display over and over again, and if they are then that's your issue and not the fault of the recording artist. In the words of Dave Grohl "you can sing a song to 85,000 people, and they'll sing it back for 85,000 different reasons."

So you can fuck off with these 'male feelings', as the fact that the song is written by a man does not mean his perspective is instantly worthless. I would actually argue the contrary and state that 'male feelings' hold much greater meaning in the majority of music I listen to, but that's a tenuous statement that makes no difference to my music tastes. I honestly don't care who wrote the bloody song, the only thing that matters is if it's any good. I just get the sense that you're so full of shit that you're completely oblivious to the state of the music industry. Sure a man with a lute may once have complained about his lover through music, and others still do today, but then so do Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Beyonce, and even Adele. I could go on. This is an unbelievable case of double standards. In reality the contrary to what you claim actually happens, so why should the similar views of men on relationships be demoted just because they're not women? This man with a lute still has a valid opinion whether you like it or not. Just because he comes from a majority does not mean he's an idiot. Discriminating against him would just be creating the problem that you're trying to eradicate; and two wrongs don't make a right.

The generalisation on display here is simply shocking. I hate to break it to you, but not all music produced by male artists is the same. Instead of just being a stuck up and ignorant bitch, why not simply adapt your music tastes or even be a bit more open and accepting. May I suggest you listen to my collection of songs at the bottom of the page. I can assure you that the stereotypical messages that you assume will be in there are nowhere to be found. You might even find they contain much more powerful messages than in any song produced by a women, and that's because in my opinion they do. That's not to say you should dismiss female artists altogether, but you have to try things before you can simply dismiss them. I think this whole argument can be summed up with your final complaint about male artistry, which you still haven't understood is a subjective topic. Your sheer ignorance is highlighted by the word 'I'. It's only a simple comment, but it shows the reader just how self centered you really are. It's like you're saying that it doesn't matter if other people can relate to the song, if I can't then it's obviously invaluable. Stop trying to suggest that this is a universal issue when the only person it effects is yourself.

A little side-note is that 'Triple J' is an Australian radio station that operates in a very similar fashion to 'Radio 1' here in the UK. It's basically a station that plays the latest tracks, and is certainly not my cup of tea. After having listened to it I can confirm that the station just plays complete bollocks, and so I don't really blame you for wanting to turn it off. That has absolutely nothing to do with gender, it's just that I don't like the song that's being played. But you see I'm not like one of those self centered bastards that call themselves male musicians, and so I will tailor my argument to something that you can relate to. I for example get fed up with songs by Kylie Minogue, but that has absolutely nothing to do with female feelings. On the other hand I love a bit of Midnight Oil or Steely Dan, but that's because they're good songs, and nothing to do with the fact that they're male artists. I just wish you would stop being so damn ignorant, dismissing perfectly valid forms of art just because of the gender of the artist. Of course I understand that the stereotype of douchebags singing about their feelings does happen, and I don't like that either, but that's no reason to be bigoted towards a whole gender. Why should I stop listening to my favorite artists because the minority decide to ruin it? Sure my music may be gender dominated, but that doesn't mean I don't enjoy a bit of Suzi Quatro every now again.

Then to cap it all off you just try and shift the blame towards men for your own actions. Of course there is going to be an outrage of male deluge when you post shit like this on Twitter. They're obviously going to disagree with your opinion, and they're entitled to expel their comments. Some of them might not be nice, but that's the price you pay for exercising your right to free speech. I just don't understand how you can be so obnoxious. It's Twitter for god sake, a public domain. If you don't want comments from strangers then post the thing on Facebook or another method of social media that doesn't broadcast on a global scale. You then go onto make outrageous claims that you back up with precisely zero evidence. You just can't make claims that the world is saturated by what men think, because without anything to back that up the reality is almost certainly very different. I also like your use of capitalisation. It doesn't say much for your argument when you have yet to understand that the words 'what', 'man', 'a', and 'thinks' are not proper nouns and so should not be capitalised in that circumstance. Come on, I'm know you didn't read through your argument as you would have realised that it's complete bollocks, but that's just basic grammar. Anyway let's not detract from the issue of 'samey' male music, which is a laughably bad generalisation. Seriously though, how many songs are out there that center on the same subject but are in completely different styles? In your own example you must be able to see your narrow minded approach to this solution. Maybe you didn't like that particular buffet, and as a result you probably wouldn't go there again. But you wouldn't automatically assume that all buffets were bad because of one experience. Branch out a little. Because of your ridiculous prejudice there maybe a buffet out there that you would just love, just as there maybe a song performed by a male artist out there that you would enjoy, but you don't help yourself by being so narrow minded.





















But her moronic argument is okay guys, because at least she came about the solution honestly. I'm sure Hitler also came about his solution to the Jewish population honestly but that under no circumstances can justify his actions. If you're tired of listening to men talking about their boners then just simply listen to something else in the diverse world that is music. May I suggest something like 'Stairway to Heaven', 'Master of Puppets', or even 'Hotel California'. Not one of those songs is about male boners, and neither are the majority of songs in my collection. So why is my preference in music not a legitimate form of art when women like Beyonce, who are absolute shite in comparison, are? Pretty sure the song 'Single Ladies' was about lust, as was 'Irreplaceable'. But for some reason, that's okay in your opinion because she can't get a boner. Well maybe she can't but the men who write her fucking songs can, so if anything she's just as bad as these stereotypical men who talk about their 'samey' feelings, you absolute fucking hypocrite. This just shows me that this really hasn't got anything to do with the quality of music. You're so ill informed and self centered that it's become quite clear to me that this is just a way for you to bash men so you can feel good about yourself. This is about as sexist as an article can possibly get, yet you have the audacity to try and play the role of the victim here. It's actually quite infuriating when you consider that other women across the globe have to fight for the right to speak, only so you can feel good about yourself in an argument that has nothing to do with gender.

Just stop talking about boners. What is your obsession with the fucking things? If all you can picture is some erect cocks when you hear male music then that's encroaching on an area of pseudoscience that's actually quite disturbing. I could go all Sigmund Freud at this point, but unlike yourself I enjoy the use of facts, and won't just jump to conclusions on the account of a single person. It's like you think that all male music is solely centered on boners, which is simply not true. In your funny little world it's only women that can talk about members of the same sex and sexual desires of the opposite sex. Well Eleanor, I hear your argument and raise you the songs 'Easy Lover' and 'Mr Crowley'. The first is about a women's sexual desires from a male perspective, and the other is a song about a man named Alastair Crowley. That's pretty much your whole argument out the window. What you're saying is obviously bollocks, and with just two songs I've pretty much just made the whole thing invalid. You're so deluded that I would hate to show you the best selling artists of all time, as you would discover that actually it's only you that thinks music produced by men is on the way out. It's just beyond belief that you can actually make a statement like that and want to be taken seriously.

Just because you're adamant about something does not mean it applies for society. I find it laughably stupid that you can moan about male artists for being self centered when in reality you're so duped you can't even see that the only problem here is yourself. Please just read through your argument again, maybe back it up with evidence and I might just start to take you seriously. It's hard to even sympathise with you when you admit that the whole thing is pointless in the final line. You admit yourself that music is being made by women in this modern age, so even in your narrow minded and didactic mind there still isn't an issue to be made here. So please, never write utter bollocks like this ever again until you actually have an argument, or you'll end up looking like a massive tit.