Thursday 10 December 2015

Why You Absolutely Shouldn't Be Having Sex With Dogs

I find it amazing that with just a quick look on the internet you can stumble upon something as disturbing as this. Here is a video of a girl, presumably single, explaining why other girls should have sex with their dogs. Yes you read that correctly, and now for your benefit I'll attempt to analyse her views from my perspective.


1) Just because the Romans and Greeks have documented cases of people having sex with dogs doesn't mean it should be encouraged thousands of years later. The Romans and Greeks also had documented cases of slavery, gladiatorial combat and public executions, so should that be encouraged as well?
2) Well that's just fucking disgusting. I suppose if you get pleasure out of it then feel free to continue, but I would prefer if you didn't broadcast that view all over the internet.
3) Well yeah, no shit. I'd also like to inform you that you can also have sex with your own species without getting pregnant; it's called contraception. The wonder of modern life means that you don't have to indulge in bestiality to avoid getting pregnant.
4) Oh I'm glad there's only one documented case of somebody having a fatal allergic reaction. I'm sure the dog shagging community is huge so this isolated case is a rarity, but thanks for increasing the number of people I'm aware of that have died from having sex with their dogs. Also it's not true that having sex with dogs doesn't carry diseases. Dogs may not carry traditional human based STD's, but they do carry rabies, Q fever, toxocariasis, and Weil's disease, which are all arguably worse than the side effects of having unsafe sex with your own species.
5) It's been around a while, must be alright then. Malaria predates the existence of human civilization so I'm sure that too is a great thing to recommend to people.
6) You are correct in saying that bestiality is legal in some countries and states. The word 'some' is doing a lot of work in that sentence and might indicate that the majority of people view this sort of stuff as completely fucked up. For reference it's been illegal in the UK to have sex with animals since 1290, so frowning upon having sex with dogs is hardly something revolutionary in the civilised world.
7) Really? I would have never guessed that fucking dogs is something that most people wouldn't do, as a lot of people have at least a shred of dignity. If you're the sort of person that gets sexually excited over dogs then you are in a huge minority, and it's not hard to work out why.
8) I'm glad it's convenient for you. It's also convenient to murder everyone who lives down the same street as you, but you don't use that as an excuse to start breaking the law do you? How desperate are you for sex? If you want convenient sex then why not just get a human partner? Not that a human partner is likely after you released this video.
9) Of course they don't nag or complain, they're dogs. Unless you're an expert in animal psychology, which I highly doubt, then how the fuck do you know how the dog is feeling? You must be aware that dogs show emotion in different ways to humans, so for all you know the dog could be dying inside a little each time his tongue has to go inside you.
10) Fuck me, I didn't realise this scheme was some sort of sex slavery. If this makes you want to fuck dogs then I'm not only concerned for your wellbeing, but humanity as a whole. How as a species have we let this happen?

Just in case you do fancy a bit of fun with your pet after watching this then please first consider whether you have at least a shred of human decency. If not then bestiality might be a good thing for your life, but please don't assume that because something breathes it instantly means you should feel entitled to start shagging it unless you really are that desperate. Not only is this sort of bestiality borderline sadistic, but it's also really fucking disturbing and degrades humanity as a whole. So no people, stop fucking dogs and broadcasting it all over the internet.

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